Conference Full of Odd Ducks

On Sunday I got back from a Holy Spirit conference in Long Island NY. A friend from church took me. I had heard of one of the guys who was was speaking, but I wasn't that familiar with him or the other guy who was hosting the conference. I sent the promo email to a couple friends just to show them what I was going to and one friend wrote back that they looked "too pretty" to be legit. I had to admit that the head shots and dark tans gave me pause as to what sort of ministry they could have. I have a strong distaste for fake baking.

But as usual, I went in with an open mind. I was expecting to encounter God. I'm in transition and have been crying out for clarity about where to go next in life. So I figured I had nothing to lose.

I didn't grow up in the church and have never been to an official charismatic church, so I still kind of marvel at what goes on at these charismatic gatherings. I noticed that there was a huge amount of racial diversity, probably due to the fact that the meeting was outside of New York City, but there was also a large amount of personality diversity. I will kindly call them "eccentric people."

Worship had already begun after we arrived and so we found seats near the front. Immediately I was out of my element. They weren't playing the Jesus Culture or Hillsong music I'm used to and I didn't know the songs. People were worshiping freely, which didn't bother me, but I could've gotten distracted.

I thought about how in mainstream churches we all close our eyes and sing our songs to God and get all hot and bothered if someone nearby is swaying too much, or singing off key, or their baby starts crying during the sermon. We think, "How dare that person interrupt my personal worship experience with God!"

I was reminded of a sermon my friend Adam did (see the right tab of this blog and go to his podcast on the Shema), about how worship is supposed to be corporate and not all about the benefits of my personal God. So I decided to open my eyes and look at all these eccentric people. I asked God to help me feel connected to the corporate Body of Christ- not just the people who look like me- but everyone. These strange people. And as I worshiped with my eyes OPEN I looked around the room. I asked God to let me feel His love for those- sorry- weirdos. I got past their dancing and arm waving. I got over how "distracting" they were. Heaven help you if you had ADD. I started to think about what the purpose of worship is anyway. Is it to close your eyes and feel God as if you were alone in a room full of other believers? Or is it to feel the love of God coming from the other believers?

I didn't feel better immediately, but by the second day I really started to appreciate the differences among us all. It occurred to me to ask how much we are really stretched to love people and use our gifts to edify the Body when everyone in our churches looks just like us. How is our love for others tested when we only associate with people we feel comfortable around? How easily are we offended when someone different walks into our church and disrupts our sense of how one should worship God?

I recalled the quote by Mike Bickle of I.H.O.P., the International House of Pancakes- I mean- Prayer... He said, "God offends the mind to reveal the heart." For me a lot of the conference was about offending the areas where my mind had gotten stodgy and comfortable. He wanted to nudge me out of my comfort zone to open me up for greater revelation. He wanted to see if I'd miss it simply because it came out of the mouth of somebody I thought was too tan- or was dressed like an elf. Seriously. At one point I had my eyes closed and was listening to this woman who had come up to share a word. Half way through I opened my eyes to see this small woman wearing a sparkly shirt, puffy pants and boots, with her hair pulled back with this feathery clip that made her ears look more pointy. I thought, "Oh my gosh, that woman really looks like an elf!" I could have been so focused on that, or offended by that, that I missed the fact that she was speaking a powerful word of encouragement.

In the end I got packed full of tons of clarity, direction, and encouragement- all of which I could have missed if I had focused on the oddity of the message barriers.

So next time somebody in church makes you uncomfortable, or someone's expression of worship is different from yours- or even more- their doctrine... ask yourself if you would be willing to miss out on something that God might want to reveal to you through that person just because it comes in a different package than you are used to. And learn from Balaam, who was so blind and resistant to what God was trying to show him that had to hear the truth from his donkey!